I Love The Smell Of Sulfur In The Morning...

So, the Venezuelan president, Mr. Hugo "El Lococito" Chavez, had some choice words for President Bush at the U.N. this week. Calling Bush "the devil," he said that he could still "smell sulfur" at the podium the day after Bush's U.N. address.

Personally, I think maybe Bush just had a few too many beans in his breakfast burrito, or something. The idea that he could be the Angel of Darkness incarnate, masquerading as a long, tall Texan with a speech impediment (elpublico nilcomprenditis, I believe it's called) is tantalizing on so many levels, but I reluctantly admit it's unlikely.

Sigh.

I was actually quite irritated by El Lococito's remarks, because he has forced me into the position of defending a man (Bush) that I don't even like. But for all my criticism of our current administration, I find it appalling and reprehensible that a foreign leader would come to a solemn assembly of the United Nations and viciously insult the host nation's president--our president--in front of the rest of the world.

To call his behavior "unprofessional" is an understatement on a par with calling Vietnam a "skirmish."

Not to mention the utter irony of people like Chavez and, God help us, Ahmaisndgagkhjhasdbgebd, or however you spell the name of Mr. "I Am A Logical, Reasonable Man Who Loves Everyone, So Don't Take It The Wrong Way When I Say 'Death To America!'" Iranian president, calling Bush on the carpet for being a tyrant and a dictator and flouting human rights all over the place.

Is Venezuela or Iran such a beacon of democratic light that they can really pretend to shine the beams of their enlightenment on our woefully benighted society? Please.

But perhaps I am being uncharitable. Maybe these two vitriolic psychos (El Lococito and Mr. Nuclear Love) just need to take a break from all their efforts at inducing the birth pangs of World War III and come chill out on the west coast for a bit. Have a margarita, kick back on the golden beaches, and watch a pretty sunset. Get a new perspective. Maybe they'll even try surfing!

Hopefully without any napalm or valkyries to accompany them...